HOW TO STOP ARGUMENTS IN 5 EASY STEPS
Arguments generally happen because both parties are trying to express different opinions and think the other person is not listening, so couples shout at each other to be heard. But most of the time the shouting doesn’t do the trick so you get upset, angry and frustrated as well as. Here are a few suggestions that may help
1) PRE-EMPT THE ARGUMENT
There are some arguments that couples know are gonna happen. For example: You come home late again after work from another lads night out and you “know” your partner is going to be upset or argue with you. Instead of thinking of what to say to defend yourself in that argument, pre think what your partner will say in the argument. Example for this scenario, she may say “I`m sick of you leaving me with the kids and going out gallivanting all night” Instead of trying to make excuses, think of what you can do to make the situation right. Example say straight away before she speaks “This Saturday you go treat yourself to a manicure, on me, and then maybe go on a girls night out and I will have the kids” Doing this will stop her attack/blame argument and your defend /backlash argument from the get go.
Some domestics can be solved simply by purchasing domestic appliances. Here are a few home help tips that can make your relationship work much better. If you argue about dishes, get a dish washer. If you argue about housework, get a cleaner, if you argue about clothes washing everywhere or you never hang out the washing, get a drier, if you argue about cooking, get some appliances to make cooking easier example a rice cooker, George foreman grill, slow cooker ect. There are people who will do DIY, walk the dog, babysit, do the ironing, all sorts. It’s not about saving money, it’s about saving your relationship.
3) THINK ABOUT IT
Say for example you are constantly late to meet your partner or you constantly leave your dirty washing on the floor not in the washing basket, but you generally forget. Instead of defending yourself in a argument, just ask your partner what can she do to help you remember? Example say “I don`t mean to be late, could you possibly text me an hour before we meet to remind me to leave work on time” or “I know I keep leaving the washing on the floor. Is it ok for me to put my clothes straight into the washing machine instead of the basket?” Couples say they constantly argue about the same thing. “Here we go again” kind of thing. If you’re constantly arguing about the same stuff then it isn’t gonna change. Take a step back and Think what can be done to better things.
4) MIND BLOWING
Women generally use both sides of the brain for multitasking. This can be over bearing for guys when it comes to arguments as women remember far more than men as it is our nature to do so. But you guys are single focused and use one side of your brain for getting “the job done”. Use that skill of yours in arguments. Don`t get pulled in and focus on the end result. Man up and take control of the argument. Recognise if it’s not getting anywhere’s and pull back. And before you get vex and upset remember this… Her mind is angry but her heart still cares.
5) WIN TO LOSE
A lot of guys try to win arguments without actually thinking that they may lose their relationship. Just take a few minutes and have a big think about if you do really want to lose your partner. Men get so stuck in their righteousness. The number one reason for relationship breakups is arguments. So the next time you feel the shit is going to hit the fan, remember this question…. Do you want to win, or do you want a relationship?